


Why Me?

by snowezrogers



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Abandonment, Blind Character, Blindness, Food, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Starvation, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-09
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:47:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23567809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snowezrogers/pseuds/snowezrogers
Summary: Deceit’s room disappears after his rejection from both the light and dark sides. Roman finds a blind, weak snake in the Imagination after months of Deceit being missing.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Deceit Sanders, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Deceit Sanders
Comments: 4
Kudos: 112





	1. Deceit

Deceit had no idea how long he had been wandering. At some point, not long ago, he remembered coming upon a village, surely somewhere in the Imagination still. They had kept him for two days and stoned him in the accusation of witchcraft because of his scales.

They’d also cut his eyes, making bloody ‘tears’ run down his face in a way that made him think it looked like Virgil’s old makeup, how he used to make it look like he’d cried to make it run. He was only wearing a black pair of jeans, sneakers and a yellow sweater. He would be in his full attire if only he had a room.

The rejection of both sides had destroyed his room, therefore he wasn’t needed. It set him to wander the Imagination, which was turning to winter. He had debated many times jumping into the Unconscious only to bring himself to tears thinking about how Thomas would lose someone who protected him.

And, with what those villagers did, he was fearful of what Roman would do if he found the scaled side. So he determined he had to keep moving. He was stumbling still, eyes useless. He wouldn’t even know if he had wandered into the Unconscious now with these blind eyes.

Everything was blurred and misty with time being thrown to the wind and the day/night cycle his body had maintained was long thrown to the wind. He was weak and helpless and vulnerable and he hated it but he couldn’t change it.

He still felt sick from throwing up the day before when the village’s preacher had given his eyes their bloody severance. He didn’t quite notice where he was going. How _could_ he? He wasn’t able to see and he’d barely ever left his room before it disappeared.

“Oh hey, Scales of Justice. Where are you going?” Came a familiar voice in a calming tone, he recognized it, but it had been so long since he’d heard it that he couldn’t pinpoint who that was.

“Are you okay?” The voice came again, this time gentle hands taking his own. The voice was so familiar but he just couldn’t put a finger on it yet. “Deceit?”

His head snapped up. Roman? This was Creativity. He needed to get away! He immediately let go of Roman’s hands, about to run away when gentle but firm hands caught him again by the wrists.

“Dee, are you okay? Do you need...“ Roman asked gently but, over his heartbeat slamming in his ears, the deceitful side was too scared to really hear what he was saying.

He hissed, a sudden, violent instinct that told him to fend himself away from this person no matter who they were. He felt tears falling over and his body shaking but Roman didn’t let go. He held firmly and pulled him in against his body to keep him close.

“No. Dee, no. Why would you do that?“ Roman sounded...wait, not scary? Not hateful or angry or even just annoyed but...protective? He suddenly felt his face against something soft, Roman’s shirt maybe? Deceit’s hands were between them, against the creative trait’s chest.

Maybe trusting this one side was okay? His panic melted away with Roman combing gentle fingers through his thin, brittle hair and his easily bruising skin. Without a room, also came no food as imagination food wasn’t edible to sides lest they felt like dying of ingesting what would be, to them, foam and acid. His hair had grown brittle months ago and his body skinnier and skinnier the less he could take care of it.

“Come on, buddy. It’s getting cold.“ Roman reminded him, gently bundling him in what felt like a thick blanket around his shoulders. His bones did, indeed, feel cold, freezing to the center. His skin, more like pallid paper, was probably blue from extreme malnourishment. His face still felt frostbitten, a feeling he’d frown accustomed to with the weight loss.

He let Roman’s gentle hand hold around his waist and tense for a second before beginning to pull him closer, leading him somewhere. The Mind Palace? His castle? A makeshift room? He didn’t know.

“Have you been eating?“ Roman asked. He knew his voice was burned to its wits end from the last two days of screaming in pain but he still needed to respond.

“No.“ His voice was definitely distinctly worn out. Even with the one word, his voice was struggling to be audible. But, thankfully, Roman was a good listener.

“You were pretty close to the Unconscious, are you alright? Your eyes aren’t focussing.“ The prince was careful guiding him around even without knowledge of his new blindness. It made tears spring to his eyes and pain the still fresh cuts in them.

“’M blind.“ He admitted to the prince and Roman gasped audibly and gentle fingers held his lower cheek to, seemingly, gaze into his eyes.

“By Zeus, those are already healed wrong. Why haven’t you got to your room, Dee?“ The prince sounded worried.

“My room is gone.“ He told him outrightly. Another gasp.

“I’ll get it back for you then. Until I can do that, you’ll stay at my castle so you don’t have to worry about ever being lost alone.“ He felt more tears and ducked his head down. He shouldn’t cry over this. He was a side, he was stronger than crying over something so simple as Roman offering him help.

“It’s okay, Dee, we’ll get you some food and I’ll make sure you’re nice and warm and safe.“ And then he really did start crying, buried into Roman’s neck and hiccupping. He hated being weak but Roman just hugged him close and didn’t complain.

When Deceit managed to stop crying, Roman picked him up and carried him to his castle. Deceit fell asleep somewhere along the way there but he woke up to a soft bed under him and what he hoped was Roman against his front. He grasped at the other person’s clothes, trying to find Roman’s logo patch. If he found that, he could tell who it was.

“You’re awake.“ Roman’s hand cupped his face. Dee nodded and snuggled closer to the other side and Roman ran his thumb over the scales under his hand. ”Do you feel okay?”

“Better, a little bit.“ He admitted softly.

“That’s good. Are there any foods you like specifically?“

“No dairy, allergic.“ The snakelike side admitted.

“So how about you take a shower if you want and I’ll get you some soup.“ Roman suggested. Dee nodded and let Roman guide him to the bathroom and show him with touch how to use the shower before leaving the snake to his own devices with clean clothes on the counter across from the shower.


	2. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Deceit try to get along and someone finds out.

By the time he was done showering and getting dressed, Roman was back and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Are you decent?" The prince asked.

"Yeah." His voice felt a little better with the heat of the shower helping build it back up. Roman came into the bathroom and Deceit let Roman take his hand and help him back to the bed, settling the bowl of soup into his hands and letting him eat to himself.

He didn’t force him to speak or make small talk to pass time. He just seemed to be looking up things on his phone or maybe checking on the other light sides. Deceit didn’t mind the quiet, he was quite used to it with how little time he used to spend out of his room. It was a welcomed silence until it finished his soup.

"What happened to you, Dee?" Roman asked gently.

"Cecil." He corrected.

"What?" Roman asked.

"My name. It’s Cecil. I wanted you to know that because you saved me."

"Cecil, what happened?" Roman corrected.

"I um...neither side wanted me so I just kept moving. A village accused me of witchcraft. They stoned me. The pastor cut my eyes." His chest felt tight and Roman immediately held his shoulders.

"Breathe, you’re okay. I’m here." Roman assured him and brought him in to hug him.

"I can’t keep going." Deceit choked out past tears.

"And that’s okay. You don’t have to tell me if you can’t. I won’t make you leave just because you can’t tell me what happened." Roman assured him. He buried into him and smiled against Roman’s neck even though he felt tears running down his face onto the prince’s skin.

"Thank you, Roman. For everything." He could feel where Roman had healed his eyes as best he could to make them look normal, though no sight could ever pass through again.

"Of course, anything you need." Roman assured him. Deceit was asleep again before he even knew what happened.

Roman, meanwhile, looked over the precious weak snake against him, hands gentle as he held him close. Dee, or rather Cecil, was shivering still, even under three blankets. But he stopped shivering when Roman held him and Roman refused to allow him to keep being cold.

His scales were dull and his hair was thin and brittle, he wanted to be as careful as possible with him. He was weak from months without food, Roman was just glad Cecil could handle the broth and hadn’t thrown up. He didn’t want Dee’s stomach and throat to hurt more than they possibly were already.

But those eyes. Roman couldn’t get the sight of them when he first found Deceit out of his mind. They’d healed improperly, yes, he was truthful of that to the lying side. But just the thought of how they looked made his stomach twist with nausea, anger, and horror.

The knife used to cut them had been dragged through them from the side closest to his nose outward, cutting through all three sections of his eye, white, iris, and pupil, all in one swipe. It made him enraged that someone in the Imagination would _ever_ do that to someone.

The injury combined with Dee’s lack of ability to heal, Deceit’s eyes had healed fully milky white. It had taken a lot of energy from the princely side to heal the deceptive side’s eyes back to looking like they did before with the brown and yellow irises, the slitted eye back to how it was. Though the milky white remained in his pupils, he couldn’t save that.

Inevitably, Roman fell asleep against the snake he guarded and woke up to Deceit just beginning to wake up against him. Deceit felt over his shoulder and Roman pressed his hand against the snake-like side’s hand.

"Still me, Cecil. Just Roman." Roman assured him and the snake seemed to deflate from his moment of panic trying to figure out who was holding him. "Would you like breakfast?" Roman asked to receive a nod.

"Would you like to come with me this time? It’s Wednesday, I go to the Mind Palace with the others today." Roman asked, getting another nod. He snapped clothes on himself, blue jeans, a white tanks top and red cardigan and his black knee boots.

"Do you want to change before we leave or would you rather not?"

"Change."

"Anything specific, you like or do you want to go through a pile?"

"Sweater. Black or yellow. Something warm maybe?" So Roman summoned just that, a yellow thick sweater and a black undershirt for it with a pair of black jeans and black boots like his own and he waited on his phone on the bed for Cecil to get dressed.

When Deceit did get dressed, Roman held his hands and sank out to the Mind Palace with him. The other three were in the living room and Remus was actually out of his and Roman's shared room quite early. Remus stopped dead in his tracks upon seeing the snake.

"Dee?" The younger twin asked, Deceit's head whipping to look toward his voice. "DeeDee, is that you?" Remus asked a little louder.

"Remus?" The snake asked, feeling for the other dark side, or, well, maybe neither were anymore. Remus had lived in the light since Thomas found out about him and Deceit was cast from them and wasn't on either side.

"DeeDee, I missed you so much!" Remus tugged him into a tight hug, Deceit pushing away to nearly collapse against Roman weakly, gasping.

"Are you okay?" Roman asked him, glaring at his twin.

"Too tight, couldn't breathe." Deceit quietly admitted as Roman held him up against him.

"Deceit, what happened?" Remus asked.

"I got rejected." Remus gasped. "So I had to be in the Imagination and I couldn't safely eat or drink anything so I got weak. Then the village and my eyes and-" Roman rubbed his arm, quieting him.

"It's okay, you don't have to keep going." Deceit snuggled into Roman's shoulder, sniffling.

"Oh, DeeDee, I should've been there to help you. I'm so sorry." Remus gently hugged Deceit this time, Deceit clutching onto his best friend and hiccupping tears as he buried himself in Remus' much more gentle hug this time.

"Remus, I missed you." Deceit struggled out past his tears.

"I'll never leave again." Remus promised, rubbing along is friend's back, letting him cry himself out.

"Breakfast!" Came Patton's cheerful voice from the kitchen, alerting the three that Logan would soon come to get them before their food got cold.


	3. Remus

Deceit was practically connected to Remus' arm, refusing to let go. He may trust the twins but he didn't know if he could trust Virgil anymore.

"Hey-oh. And who is this?" Patton's bright cheery voice asked.

"This is Deceit. He's having a bit of a hard time lately and I didn't want to leave him alone, so I brought him here with me." Roman announced.

"But today is family day. He's distinctly not-" Virgil began.

"Finish that sentence. I fucking dare you." Remus growled.

"Fine, have it your way." Virgil snapped. "When he inevitably fucks up family day, I'm not staying anymore." Virgil huffily added.

Deceit felt at the seat Remus helped him into and continued holding onto his wrist, feeling like he wasn't safe if he didn't have contact. Breakfast was easy, small talk here and blah blah, light side stuff he didn't care about.

Remus was just glad Cecil could get actual food into his body. The effect of it seemed so immediate it make Remus sure that he and Roman could help him get better. Cee's scales got shiner and seemed to have the faintest hint of their old soft glow back to them.

Cecil himself seemed too quiet, it unnerved him. He was a bit too quiet, it made him worried because Cecil always had a quip at breakfast or an overly dramatic flair or just plain something that could make Remus smile at his friend. Remus missed seeing Cecil smile like he used to.

"Hey, Cee, you talk next. What the fuck happened to you?" Virgil asked, snarky smirk on his face and Remus glared daggers at him.

"I...I don't think I can... Th-The imagination..." Cecil stammered and seemed to hide away in his seat and Remus felt fire fueling the anger boiling in his veins.

"Don't ask him shit like that!" Remus snapped at him.

"You know you remind me of a guard dog. Have you always been Deceit's guard dog?" Virgil told him. Remus growled.

"Get a life and personality, emo! Yours seems to only have room to poke at others." Remus snapped.

"Remus." Cecil felt for his hand, taking hold of his fingers softly and Remus calmed himself down so he could be gentle with his best friend so he wouldn't hurt him.

"It's okay, DeeDee. I'm calm now." He cracked a small smile but he knew Cecil wouldn't see it the smile that always told him he was calm so he held his hand closer, rubbing his thumb into his palm to calm Cecil as well.

"Deceit, not trying to put any stress on you, you can always say no, but would you like to spend time in my library today? I have plenty of audiobooks for you if you'd like." Logan offered. Remus gave him and smile, grateful he was trying to deescalate the situation.

"That sounds lovely." Cecil gave a smile toward where he'd heard Logan, a bit to the left of him, though.

After breakfast, Cecil left with Logan and Virgil laughed at Remus worriedly making sure he knew to call for him or Roman in case something happened.

"Overprotective much?" Virgil asked.

"Actually yeah, I am. He's blind, you idiot, of course I'm overprotective." Remus snarled at him. Now that Cecil wasn't here, he didn't have to worry about scaring him by being angry at Virgil.

"Wait, what?" Virgil's voice got soft, his shoulders seemed to slump like he just realized what was happening.

"He's blind. You didn't notice how different he was acting?" Virgil shook his head.

"No, I mean sometimes he gets really quiet so I just thought he wasn't wanting to talk!" Virgil looked afraid he'd hurt Deceit.

"Well, calm down. I'm sure he understands you didn't know. Just make sure you talk to him, make sure he knows you love him."

"Can we watch some ghost hunting together until he comes back?" Virgil asked.

"Of course." Remus sidled up to Virgil's side and put on a random ghost show they could watch together and Virgil leaned his head against him.

Virgil eventually fell asleep against him and Remus just watched him instead of the next episode, watching over his features not so stressed. Remus could get used to this anxious purple weight on his shoulder, curse this cute emo making his heart beat faster. Cecil would almost definitely laugh if he found out about him getting willingly trapped under Virgil.


End file.
